Throwback Thursday #30: 1995

pg 1pg 2 & 3pg 3 & 4pg 6 &7pg 8 & 9pg 10 & 11

Translation (spelling and teenage attention span intact):

July 19, 1995 Wed.
Well, Tammy is home again and I AM NOT HAPPY!  It has always been I have done everything for her but now with the baby it has gone WAY TO FAR!  I watch Blayne & I haven’t even been paid yet.  Right now I’m watching ‘The Tonight Show’ with Jay Leno and Chris O’Donnell is on- he is so-so-so HOT!!
Well, I miss Brad so very much.  I wanted to talk to him ’bout my sister but I can’t.  I was so surprised yesterday Seany called!  He is such a doll the only prob I have seeing him is he knows a TOTAL different me-  He thinks I’m really fast but I’m not- I am waiting for Brad but I get so bored ’cause Brad just doesn’t like me yet.  But I know that one day he will realize that we are ment to be together FOREVER!
ANYWAYS- enough ’bout that!
Yesterday we (Bee, Paulie, Eric, Steph, Greg & I) went & saw ‘French Kiss’ w/ Meg Ryan- she’s so cute!  Well Steph said she 7 Greg would need a ride but we went to Stephs and she was already gone so we called Greg & his sister said he already left so we were late so we went right to the movie well guess what, Greg’s sister was wrong & so he got a ride but was he mad- but it wasn’t our fault!
Well, anyway.
The Rembrants are playing on the ‘tonight show’ now.  I *heart* that song-  I’ll be there for you! its a rockin’ song.
WOW Hugh Grant is on Dave Letterman Show- He is so CUTE!  I’m so mad people won’t see his movie ’cause he got caught w/ a prostitute, but that doesn’t make him a bad actor- everyone has a prostitute he just had the misfortune of being caught.  I hate that!
We saw 9 months- it was SOOO FUNNY! Dave Letterman is so funny too.  Brad likes him-
Oh yeah- we met a new waiter at Denny’s- his name is Matt and he sings- oh DOES HE SING!!  He sang ‘Phantom of the Opera’ WOW!! But he’s not our Tina.  She is such a DOLL!  She always gives us free food.  Ain’t that sweet?  We went to Denny’s after ‘French Kiss’ and Maggie (Bee’s friend) came up.  then we went to Bee’s house & played Mexican Dominoes until Eric and Paulie wanted to go somewhere & touch- GROSS!
Well, we might not be going to Tantera for SL&DM camp
(section leader and drum major-pervs) that sucks- I was really looking forward to that-
Dave Letterman is such an ass- just the other day Tom Arnold was on and they were totally going off on Hugh and when he (Hugh) comes on he’s kissin’ butt.  Just like a talk show host- what a jerk.
At Denny’s yesterday Steph said ‘Oh I just noticed Tricia, you were the only one here w/out a lead or a solo’. I was like you BITCH shut up- just totally ruin my whole fucking messed up life.  Just because I really SUCK doesn’t mean she has to throw it in my face.
Reba’s on Dave now.  Gosh I wish I could have her voice.  This song is so, so cool- it’s about this lady who meets an old flame & she still *heart*’s him but he’s married and it really hurts her.  Isn’t it sad-
Well, MST3K is on now. It is so FUNNY– I *heart* it so much!
Sean- you don’t know him do you? He is sweet & funny& really cute.  I enjoyed the times we had together but I don’t know if I want them again- That’s another reason why I need to speak to Brad.  I just can’t wait for a freakin’ letter- I miss him so very much- I can’t wait to see him again.
Anne & I went for Flags tonight & we bought some ledger stuff for Laurie our secretary & not I found out that Anne & Laurie aren’t getting along so Anne is going to be w/ me for a while- Whatever, isn’t that want always happens.  Laurie stops being her friend so Anne runs to me.  Whatever, isn’t that just STUPID-
Well, it’s really late so I better sign off
*heart* Tricia

What else is a 14 year old girl about to turn 15 do?  She is going to stay up all night watching crappy television while writing snip-bits about her life in her diary.  It’s nice to know I haven’t changed that much as I binge watch Big Brother and Facebook too much for a normal 34 year old.  Twenty years ago… wow.

This rambling bit of my history is quite telling of my current personality.  My ability to connect random thoughts and still bring it back to a central idea is vital to my current job and my life passion of being a Stage Manager and a Director.  The point in this current diary is that I do a lot of random activities, have a wide group of various friends, have old lovers that call, have points of view on actors and prostitutes all whilst still overall pining  for one boy… the ever present, all encompassing  Brad.

It is scary how attached I was to him.  How even through most of my boyfriends, and love interests, I always had a goal of marrying him.  These were all gap stops until my Jewish Wedding and Hockey Team Sized Amount of Children.  Needless to say it took a massive amount of drug usage, hippy soul searching and one bad night of embarrassment to separate myself from my Brad Addiction.  (although I do have brief moments right before I fall asleep where my brain will whisper Brad and I have dreams about our “future life” which is already, in reality, “past life” because I am like 20-something… this is getting way to internal-  MOVING ON!)

The Freaks:

This is a photo from this summer I am writing about in my diary.  We called ourselves "The Freaks" I am sitting in the chair next to Ellie and Page.  Behind us is Bee, Paulie and Eric.

During the summer of 1995 I was predominately hanging out with a group of friends that labeled ourselves “The Freaks”, although to be honest we were probably the least “freakiest” people or towards the “more normal” side of the spectrum, but it was the name we chose.  They were really good people.  We didn’t do drugs.  We didn’t drink.  We ate parmesan popcorn, watched movies, played drama games and mexican dominoes (which I am going to take a stand that wasn’t racist, because we didn’t do anything derogatory about Mexican people, in fact the only thing we mentioned that was Mexican was the Mexican Train that we all “choo-choo’d”… yes, we were those “good kids”.)  These friends, with their band camps, their Denny’s late night coffee runs, their whole-hearted openness to every person they met was in start contrast to “Seany” and what I had left behind my Sophomore year of High School.

I reinvented myself as much as I could this summer.  This is when my personality as a funny go-getter and goody-two-shoes began.  This is the anal retentive Tricia’s birth and her petrie dish of people that shared her values and social norms.  This is when Tricia started to really separate into “good Tricia” and “not-so-good Tricia”.

This is a little out of the timeline, but a lot of the ladies I talk about, or are from this time period, are in this photo so I am going with it! Paulie, Steph, Ellie, Mandy, Me, Julie, Erica and Jenny

This is a little out of the timeline, but a lot of the ladies I talk about, or are from this time period, are in this photo so I am going with it! Paulie, Steph, Ellie, Mandy, Me, Julie, Erica and Jenny

This entry was so much fun to remember Hugh Grant and his awesome escapades, my love of Mystery Science Theatre 3000, that I watched almost religiously.  I loved the rambling nature of the entry and my clearly weird obsession with Brad.  My quick to anger over a potential insult while I also insult myself in the same sentence.  My ability to  talk about nothing and say so much.  So, glad I have this talent today so that you are forced to read it through my blog!  Ha!  Gotcha!

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